K.C.P.E COMPOSITION 2012

Below is the beginning of a story. Write and complete the story. Make your story as interesting as you can.

When I knocked on the door, nobody opened immediately. I was just about to leave when my aunt came to the door smiling………………………

ACROSS THE BRIDGE

When I knocked on the door, nobody opened immediately. I was just about to leave when my aunt came to the door smiling. It was no doubt she was exhuberant and in a king’s mood. I could not figure out the cause of her exhuberance but I was equally curios.

Ever since I moved in and stayed in my aunt’s house, life has been a hell here on earth. We lived from hand to mouth. Life for us was a hard nut to crack. I abhorred the fact that all my allys were well of while I was a languishing pauper.

My aunt started humming a tune which she rarely did an inkling that she was in seventh heaven.“Job. I have found a job.” She finally blurted out. I was utterly bewildered since tortoise seemed to have knocked on our door. I also had a job, too ashamed to reveal it, I was an eminent drug trafficker.

It all started when I met Sam, my ally, or so I thought we were birds of a feather and we enjoyed each other’s company. He was well off and that was what attracted me most to him. Sam was ugly only deserving a mother’s natural love. His character and personality was pathetic. I had to swallow the bitter pill and at least earn a living.

He not only introduced me to drugs but also made me a drug trafficker. As long as I got money I cared the less about and possible danger.

My life changed drastically. My apparels were designer labels and my posh cars were nothing compared to my mansions. I met manifolds of personalities. I mingled with the high and mighty and I felt worthy every time I was with the cream of creation. Life seemed too good to be true.

I had finally crossed the bridge, not just an ordinary bridge, but the gap between a nobody and somebody.

I contributed the lion’s share in providing the basic needs in my aunt’s home. I prefer not telling my aunt where I get the money. She is egocentric and maybe she may ruin my life again.

“I will be a waiter” she finally said. I smiled sheepishly, only hoping that destiny will once again rescue my foolish actions. Whatever the case, I had crossed the bridge.

MERITS

The candidate has a good command of English language. The reader is taken through twists of fate, being kept in suspense till the end.

The script is well written an easy to read with punctuations being taken care off.

There is an attempt to use vocabularies and idiomatic expressions which have been underlined in the composition e.g.

(i)Exuberant.

(ii)Languishing

(iii)Abhorred

(iv)Egocentric

(v)Blurted out

(vi)utterly bewildered

-Phrases e.g

Lived from hand to mouth

Hard nut to crack

Swallow a bitter pill

High and mighty

In seventh heaven

DEMERITS

The composition has a few mistakes especially in spelling, for example

-Egoscentric instead of egocentric

-Well of instead of well off

-Allys instead of allies

-The word manifolds is not used in the right place. The word variety or diverse would have been better.

-However, the few mistakes do not have a big impact on the overall flow of the composition.


Last modified: Thursday, 25 June 2015, 11:53 PM